Things that make me go "errrrr...."

1. News on negligence for a supposed-to-be-simple circumcision procedure in Malaysia has caused me to lose some sleep. I have an appointment for Humaidi to be circumcised this coming Friday in San Iku Kai hospital, where I gave birth to him. Huzaifah was circumcised when he was only 4 days old, but here, circumcision could only be performed on person over 3 months old, due to the anesthetic used. My cousin Hafiz who is studying medicine in Australia reassured me that the negligence cases in circumcision is very, very rare… but still, it does got me rattled…

2. Long before I was married, Mak spelled it out quite clearly that we should not depend on her and Ayah to take care of our children. However, as it was, Mak was the one who took care of Huzaifah for the first 6 months of his life. Now that I have two kids to look after, Mak has asked me to consider sending Huzaifah back to Malaysia, so that it would be easier for me to study/write my dissertation. Mak said that while it is probably best for kids to be raised by their own parents, circumstances may differ from person to person and time to time. Ayah asked me to seriously consider this too. I casually cautioned Ayah that having extra energetic Huzaifah around might cause his Tok Ayah to be extra letih. But Ayah just said “bagus lah, cucu aktif, nanti Tok Ayah pun aktif la sama…” Hubby said he is leaving the final say entirely to me…

3. My younger brother is going to get married in November. I would very much like to go back at least for the kenduri sambut menantu. I believe Mak will be glad to have someone else to see to details of the kenduri. And these things could only be done in person, there in Malaysia, not by someone who is thousands of miles away. But there are other more pressing (financial) matter that we have to handle right now, so I am not sure whether or not I will be able to go back home for his wedding…

4. I don’t think I fit in my current zemi (sort of homeroom, where students who share the same supervisor belong to). I actually asked for a different supervisor, but upon entrance as full time student, was assigned to this. My proposed thesis has nothing to do with the so-called expertise area of my supervisor. I was hoping to be able to mix (and practice Nihongo) with more Nihonjin in zemi since I am not attending a lot of classes now, but there is none in my zemi. None. Instead Mandarin is often spoken in the zemi when I understand zilch. Frankly, I am jealous of other zemis where the members seem to get along so well, able to go on trips together, hang out after class, celebrate birthdays, and the Nihonjin members helping their gaijin zemi counterparts with stuff like explaining letters/notices or making phone calls in Nihongo in time of need. Mine? Well, for a start, none of them visited me at the hospital or merely called to congratulate me when I gave birth to Humaidi even after I told the zemi’s ‘monitor’ the happy news. Oh, and the monitor herself sometimes call me “Arza”. I seriously feel like changing my zemi, but I have been advised by others not to do it, because we never know if we might end up having the current supervisor as the second examiner who might not take the decision to change to another zemi very kindly…

5. Huzaifah is still not talking in any language his parents could understand even when we are only using BM exclusively. I know, the positive effect of using three different languages while he was a baby might not show just yet, but I really wish that he could talk properly now. I have seen parents with toddlers his age able to actually chat with each other yet Huzaifah is still stuck at having “ta-ta” as the only vocabulary that his parents could understand…